Here’s to life

Here’s to life and dreamers and their dreams.

funny how the time just flies

how love can go from warm hellos to sad to goodbyes

Such a poignant song. Life is so short, yet so many are wandering around thinking they have forever. They put off happiness for the future that may or may not come to pass. Crazy to think of all of the time wasted. How much time do you waste every day?

Life doesn’t give us a start and end date. Yes many of us will live until we’re old but not all of us. And the quality of life reduces as the years pass for the vast majority. How do I meet men over 40 who really feel there is no need for a relationship, as it’s something they are putting off till…. till when?

So much preoccupation with the future, a distant future at that. Why not live for today? Tomorrow? The actual present moment that is real and here right now? It’s a methodology of thinking that has been around for ages, yet is still seen as a fringe hippy, outlier belief system. Social media has made the issue worse and so many men are stuck in a peter pan like mentality. More authenticity is needed in the world. More present moment thinking and belief systems need to be improved before the world implodes. Moral bankruptcy is an epidemic. Hopeless romantics like myself are an endangered species.

So let’s raise a glass, to life, to love, to the present moment as it’s all we have.

What NOT to text after a date

So this was less than 24 hours after a great first date, he was happy he went on, how happy he met me, etc. The next day more freaking out, then Monday AM blocked. He then lied to everyone as to what happened. I was told he’d email….. guess it got lost in the post

The first point and you may never get past it, no I can go no further at this point. I haven’t had a relationship, and yes I’m stuck in my ways. You’re amazing and you make me smile and don’t know how we managed to cross paths. I feel sick to much, everything has happened to full on. The person I was when we met is me, but also I should’ve asked for more time when we met as we’ve been to full on from day 1. What I mentioned on the phone is true and has held a part over my life for years. I’m mentally week, I always have been. I’ve started to have panic attacks and can’t sleep properly. I’ve not asked anyone but know they would say I need to take a step back as I’m not in a good way. Yes I enjoyed last night, but I’m a broken man. I’m going to have to explain everything we’ve talked about to anyone I care about as I can’t handle the uncertainty for me upsetting you and telling everyone. So I need them to here it from me. Rightfully so you say I’ve treated you badly, but also I do care. Just getting on a phone call was hard for me, coming to see you was something I’d not done for years. (Yes it’s small for most people.) You will want phone calls and to see me all the time, and that makes me happy but is also to much for me atm. I want to be the person you need me to be, but the truth is I’m to weak. You say I’ve made you scared, but I’ve been scared as well. I try to ask other people as I don’t know what is normal it has been so long. But don’t as you ask me not to. I’ve began to open up to you, like I never have to anyone. But I need to slow down. There is an obvious missing piece that you’ll be able to guess from the above, and yes it was something you said earlier. I need to step back for few days, a I’m not lying I’m honestly at the point where if you’d turned up on my doorstep I’d have wanted to be dead. I don’t know if you ever would’ve done it. But I have never felt as vulnerable and threatened as that, and you say I can’t even speak to my parents about you. If you care that I believe you do more by the day, you will leave me be for a couple of days.

Wish List *updated*

Every little help still and is super appreciated. So here it is:

My amazon wish list can be found on

Waitrose e-gift cards can be sent to my email, sexandtheswiss @

Cycling gear!

**Strava membership **

Or you can do a little extra

British airway or Swiss vouchers to help with the flying back and forth to see my daughter.

And there is always paypal as well